I believe that we all know how to love and I would hope that we all know what it feels like to be loved. I have always known that I was loved, and I thought I was generous with loving others- that was until JLB died.
When my son died I was swept into a darkness unlike anything I had ever experienced. My whole world became void of light. It is scary when everything you know becomes filled with anger and overwhelming sadness. Yet, as I felt my world fall away there were moments of love and light in the form of someone holding my hand, someone crying with me, a basket of goodies left on our porch. Even though I was so caught up in my own darkness, it was light and love that enveloped me and carried me out of my darkness. It was poured upon me, Mike, and Jack from our family, friends, and strangers who would become friends.
It wasn’t until I had been held and carried for many months did I start to see what was happening around me. People were stepping out of their comfortable places to reach out to me as I was drowning. They may not of known what to say (neither did I), or what to do, but they did something because they loved me and my family. They would drop a note in the mail months after his death to let me know they were thinking of us. They would stop by at JLB’s grave and leave a note. They would offer to take Jack for an afternoon so I could just be. It was these actions of love that helped me to survive my darkest days, and I am so grateful. Once I was able to see what had been happening around me, I realized that I could step out of my comfortable. I could offer love to others during their darkest times.
This was the beginning of JLB Project.
It was created out of love and being generous with that love. So often I see people who want to do something but they don’t know what to do so they choose to do nothing. They hold on to love that they want to give because they say they don’t know how. If they could just see that loving someone can come in many forms. It does not need to be a big production to give love, sometimes the smallest acts of kindness and love are the ones that make the greatest impact on those in need.
When I started JLB Project I did to know what I was doing, I was just a mother who had lost her son who wanted to reach out to other’s who had also lost. I wanted to share with other’s the love that had been so generously given to me. I want to thank JLB for giving me a greater capacity to love. He taught me how to love strangers, and how to love those closest to me in a more generous way. Thank you my son for giving me the gift of love.